music is the heartbeat of my soul

Compositions

4.24.2005

Desire of the endless - It is unlikely that any portrait will ever do Desire justice, since to see her (or him) is to love him (or her) - passionately, painfully, to the exclusion of all else...Never a possession, always the possessor, with skin as pale as smoke, and eyes tawny and sharp as yellow wine: Desire is everything you ever wanted. Whoever you are. Whatever you are. Everything.

So obviously Desire is a vainglorious person(?) or rather entity.

Here's an excerpt from "the ringmaster's daughter": i'm only in this planet for a brief visit. It's largely because of this that i've found it refreshing to talk to vain people...they are just as innocent as small children, and it is precisely this trust that i've caught myself envying. they live as if something can be achieved, as if something is up for grabs. but we are dust. so there's no point in making a fuss. or as mephistopheles says as faust dies: what matters our creative endless toil, when at a snatch oblivion ends the coil?

What a dreadful reality, don't you think?

Composed @ 6:56 PM

(1) comments

i used to promise myself one thing: that i would proclaim my diversity no matter how the mainstream lands on me. it wasn't that hard before, but as i meet new people it became more difficult to insert diversity in my lifestyle. i mean...it's hard to always go against the flow. it takes a great amount of risk and effort. then there's the thing about "labels". peeple label each other as if the very essence of their existence depended on it. i can be labeled depending on the type of music i listen to. i can be labeled depending on the clothes i wear. i can be labeled depending on my beliefs. what the hell is this suppose to mean? that each of us is required to belong to a certain group of people?! people are becoming too comfortable sleeping in the rabbit's fur. [for those who have read sophie's world, i hope you still remember] they always concern themselves with things that don't really mean anything. they continue to chase things that they don't really need. they continue to pressure themselves just so they can feel accepted.
another thing. there's this non-ending issue about posers. someone posted this in friendster and i would just like to share it to you:
poseur (po-zr) a person or rather an imbecile who dresses up, acts and thinks the way hes really not.[how the hell can you say that s/he is acting the way s/he is really not?!] Derived from the word, POSE. A person who acts different and dresses different and buy allsorts of so rad things just to IMPRESS other people. A poseur is a person who poses either as a prep, a punkster, an emo kid, a rocker, a gothwannabe, a jock, a skater or whatever it is he/she labels him/herself.[hey, what if it is the society who labeled him/her?!] What is the root of being a poseur? CONFORMITY. The need and desire to be in. So, emo is in and person dresses up in all-black get-up and slits its wrists pretending to be all drama and whining about the break-up of its loved-one and whining and crying of how the world is against him/her..but really in the reality, is that persons life really f*cked-up? Some dont really.[and you're point being?] They just feel that if they become emotional and angst-ridden, they feel that theyre so in and that they buy tons of black shirts, buy cds that so emo even tho they dont know whose the lead singer of the used [and if s/he is not really into the used? what's it to you?] is or they first thought something corporate is a company [hey, it does sound like a company] but still they but its album just for the sake of impressing others. You claim youre a rocker wannabe hot-sh*t and buy a rage against the machine t-shirt and may I ask you what songs of rage do you know? [what if s/he just wanted the shirt. for crying out loud! it's his/her right to buy what s/he wants!] Name me some. Dont reply with a Erm whats that song again? Gorilla Radio or something aw man I forgot Then youre an idiot. Why buy all those stuff when you really dont know what youre buying? You go wearing a skateboarding is not a crime shirt when really you dont even know how to handle the board. [hey, s/he is just stating that skateboarding is not a crime. s/he's not proclaiming that s/he knows how to use the damn board!] What really is youre intention? To impress people. Thats your intention flat-out. You think when you already have those chucks you think youre so punk rawk eh? Well, let me tell you, you dont. [even construction workers wear chucks. what's it to you? you jealous or what?] You just go with the flow because everyone is wearing chucks (w/c btw is so darn annoying)and then whoop-dee-doo you go to a converse store and buy a pair when really you dont like them chucks and you wanna have those skechers one. Why waste money on something you dont really want? Your intention, just to impress others.You label yourself and blabbers about bands and their songs when really you dont know anything about it.[let me repeat it. it's the society that labels people.] And the second you hear a band from a friend you storm in a record store and buy its album, just because you think its cool and its in.IMPRESSING people is what poseurs love to do.Telling them they know everything and anything there is, dressing up so punk rawk and sometimes all-black [just because i want to wear black, i'm already a poser?] and bands t-shirts. Be true to yourself,dont just go with the flow, dont try to impress others with buying them shirts, sneakers, albums,guitar, studs, pants. [what if buying these things can make me TRUE to myself?!] Yah we know youre rich.Haaahaha. I hope I informed you kiddos.[yep, you just did inform me that all of us are posers!] Avamosamigos.

Composed @ 6:09 PM

(2) comments

the voyager by rassouli

Travel beyond this place
See the vast kingdom of the space
See what you have not seen
Go where you have not been
Now experience the one world
That world is not out there
It is in your heart, right here.

Composed @ 6:05 PM

(0) comments

4.11.2005

i hate the world. i know all of us goes through this phase in life when you just feel like completely detaching yourself from the world. but for me...it seems to go on forever. i can't imagine myself to be "one" with the world. why? first of all, because they don't understand me. nobody really understood me. there are people who pretend that they do. there are people who admit that they don't. but in the end, it's just me who is capable of understanding myself. argh! nobody understands me and that's what kills me! second, because in my opinion the rest of the world are just clones of each other. they just imitate one another. they CONFORM. well, there are a few exceptions..but in general, if you are not like them then they will forever laugh at you and mock you. sheesh. you laugh because i'm different, i laugh because you're all the same. third, because i can't stand their shallowness. they keep on talking about the same things over and over again. i mean..there's more to life than your deteriorating lovelife! there's more to life than failing a test in phyiscs. no offense...maybe we just don't belong to the same wavelength. our life is already pointless as it is..why worry ourselves with more pointless things? fourth, because the world hates me as well. isn't it obvious? or am i just too pessimistic? well, whatever the case...i think the world hates me. admit it. why? i haven't done anything...just leave me alone.

Composed @ 6:23 PM

(4) comments

4.02.2005

but i being poor have only my dreams.

i have spread my dreams under your feet.

tread softly for you tread on my dreams...

Composed @ 4:34 PM

(0) comments

WELCOME

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AnNe

anne rice novels, sandman and the endless, fight club and tyler's philosophies, vampires, myths, witchcraft, churches, graveyards, baywalk, egypt and other ancient civilizations, photography, existentialism, abstract art, insomnia, aliens, lestat, vainglorious people, paranoia, conversations, sleepless nights, music, red horse, sleepovers, walkathon, gigs, stars, city lights, casper, dreams, emo tripping, misadventures, music, pinoy bands, singing, writing, rainy days, meeting strange people, foreign languages, depression, sunsets, life and death, atlantis, adolf hitler, full moon, insanity and schizophrenia, zombies, loners and posers like me, nostalgia, classic and silent movies, soul-searching, laugh trip, sound trip, food trip, humanity, my blog, god.

DREAMS

i am a materialistic person so my dreams involve material things:

sandman library

complete set of vampire chronicles

more books!

cds! cds! cds!

complete set of naruto series :p

ps2 games!
aside from material things..

i want to live in baguio

i want to earn money for myself

i want to help our country. haha.

i want to travel around the world
that's it for now! ciao!